Ah, don't tell me your wife is the only one who listens to stuff like Tom Waits! She has the most kick-ass taste in music. One day I want to just sit down with her and compare music collections. :)
How about: "Today the minutes seem like hours, The hours go so slowly, And still the sky is light... Oh moon, grow bright, And make this endless day endless night! Tonight!"
That one sticks nice and hard in my brain all the time.
Yeah, no kidding. There were a lot of people I was trying to talk to yesterday and help, and it felt like nothing was getting through. Usually me and Mercury/Hermes are tight, yo, but my brotha-man fell through on me. Consarn it. :)
Ugh. I usually don't hold with astrology, but....last night I pissed Cody off, which would make it the second time ever, and the first time wasn't serious enough that he didn't hug me goodnight after the show. We both handled the situation poorly, but some halfway decent communication would have totally fixed that. Of course, perhaps it's just a convenient excuse to blame that troublesome planet, because really there have been communication issues with him for a while. Either case, I'm hurt and things are all fucked up.
Sure, it's easy to say that. But, Laura, I have been fucking up for a lot longer.
For both of you in different ways. I spent the time I didn't manage to get to sleep today (been awake now since 5am thursday eastern time) to reread my journal. March fuck ups. April fuckups, and saying i was going to get better. April fuck ups and panicking. May fuck ups. May pissed at you for no reason. May being a putz. June, ABSOLUTE ASSHOLE. July, starting to get better, then fucking up again. ANd hurting EVERYONE. And then getting better? until just now.
I don't want any excuses: I have fucked up more and more each time, because the last time, I said I wasn't going to do it again . . .
Kudos for 'fessing up to when you've screwed up. But perhaps you are being just a little hard on yourself by demanding every time you screw up that you won't do it again? I've been down that road of escalating returns to scale on badness...it's like trying to land on an aircraft carrier, once you're off your glide path, as you get lower and lower, you have to bank more each time to try to get back on the glide path, and the harder it is to actually get it right....sometimes you just have to wave off and try again. All of us will screw up. It happens. You've gotta be able to say, ok, I screwed up this time around, and then move on...you can't win by chasing the shadow of last time and the last times before that...
...And it sounds like I should really be taking some of my own advice. Hm.
Yes, but he does have to make sure he's aware of his patterns and tries his hardest to recognize when he sees them starting, and work on getting over them.
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timeasmymeasure
no subject
Date: 2004-08-13 06:24 am (UTC)And it's pre-influential stage started almost two weeks before that. No wonder, right?
no subject
Date: 2004-08-13 06:28 am (UTC)OMFG
Date: 2004-08-13 06:28 am (UTC)Freakin' Mercury...THe only person in that family I tolerate is Freddie!
;)
Re: OMFG
Date: 2004-08-13 06:30 am (UTC)Re: OMFG
Date: 2004-08-13 07:55 am (UTC)I love Freddie to. Strange really for a straight man into classical music.
Re: OMFG
Date: 2004-08-13 08:11 am (UTC)Re: OMFG
Date: 2004-08-13 08:20 am (UTC)Re: OMFG
Date: 2004-08-13 08:27 am (UTC)"When you're a Jet, you're a Jet all the way
From your first cigarette to your last dying day"
Re: OMFG
Date: 2004-08-13 08:49 am (UTC)The hours go so slowly,
And still the sky is light...
Oh moon, grow bright,
And make this endless day endless night!
Tonight!"
That one sticks nice and hard in my brain all the time.
no subject
Date: 2004-08-13 02:09 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-08-13 06:43 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-08-13 06:52 am (UTC)no subject
no subject
Date: 2004-08-13 07:55 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-08-13 07:58 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-08-13 09:46 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-08-13 09:49 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-08-14 11:45 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-08-14 01:40 pm (UTC)I'm sorry sweetie. I know how much he means to you, and I hope the two of you get back on a good footing soon!
no subject
Date: 2004-08-13 02:29 pm (UTC)For both of you in different ways. I spent the time I didn't manage to get to sleep today (been awake now since 5am thursday eastern time) to reread my journal. March fuck ups. April fuckups, and saying i was going to get better. April fuck ups and panicking. May fuck ups. May pissed at you for no reason. May being a putz. June, ABSOLUTE ASSHOLE. July, starting to get better, then fucking up again. ANd hurting EVERYONE. And then getting better? until just now.
I don't want any excuses: I have fucked up more and more each time, because the last time, I said I wasn't going to do it again . . .
no subject
Date: 2004-08-13 02:30 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-08-13 02:42 pm (UTC)Tru, dat.
no subject
Date: 2004-08-14 12:03 pm (UTC)...And it sounds like I should really be taking some of my own advice. Hm.
no subject
Date: 2004-08-14 01:41 pm (UTC)