(no subject)

[badseed1980]

Ah hell, I hate this shit.

I feel guilty if I'm in a good mood when everything isn't good.
If I dwell on bad stuff after feeling guilty, I get depressed.
If I get depressed, I get angry.
If I get angry, I want to do and say stupid things.
If I do or say those things, bad things happen, and give me a real reason to be upset.

Guess I just sort of have to sit this one out and wait for it to be over.

I will ask a rhetorical question, though:
Why do we have to be not just hurt, but angry and catty to get the "What's wrong and what can I do to make it better?" Does that justify throwing a fit like I did a month ago in order to be heard?

Fuck, I want to go back to bed. I was up late and it's too fucking early to think straight.

Comments

[tisana.livejournal.com]

I didn't throw a fit. I just attacked people.

I wanna go back to bed, too.

[badseed1980.livejournal.com]

No, I said *I* threw a fit. I was thinking about how your attacking reminded me of when I threw a fit, and how it's not fair that we should have to resort to that sort of thing to get a response when we're not happy. I know what you did is different than what I did, but it just got me thinking about the judicious application of the clue-by-four, and how it really shouldn't be needed so often.

[tisana.livejournal.com]

Oh.
Oops.

Did I mention I was tired?

[badseed1980.livejournal.com]

Yes, totally understandable. :)

[dolphindream.livejournal.com]

I think there IS, or are? amswer(s) to your rhetorical question. I have to believe that it ISN'T inevitable that we deal with negative (or even sometimes positive) emotions in unnecessarily extreme and violent ways. There MUST be a better solution. I'm trying to work on it . . .

I think step one is being aware of and understanding our own emotions, so that we can control how we deal with them. Then figuring out what we need, and then being able to adequately communicate that to other people. sometimes "violent" expressions might be the most adequate way to get our own needs met, but hopefully it's a last resort . . .

My brain is currently still fuzzy. Something to contemplate later, when I'm more capable of contemplation . . . and now to your next post . . . ;)

[badseed1980.livejournal.com]

Well, what about when the only communication that a person will actually listen to and respond to is that kind of explosion? When calm clear discussion doesn't do anything? I think sometimes he only realizes something is important is if I throw a fit.

[pierceheart.livejournal.com]

I hope that isn't true.

That's why I told you what i did, to get things that were bugging me out in the open before they were something that would cause a fit.

I may not have done that well

[badseed1980.livejournal.com]

No, I think this time you did well. For me, anyway. I can't speak for what else might have gone on, but then again I don't know the whole situation that caused arguing and attacking. I can only assume it takes some amount of exasperation to get to that point.